I hope I did this right...

So I missed the whole "brushstrokes" lesson on Monday because I wasn't feeling too well, but based on my observations of other students' blogs, and Barbara's demonstration, I think I somewhat get an idea of what is supposed to be happening, so here it goes...
This is taken from a journal I had to write about my experience in a classroom for a teaching class.

Today was the first day of my three week observation. As I walked into class, I noticed that there were only 15 students in first period. Mrs. Smith, was the woman I was observing for, and she told the class that they needed to sit down if they wanted to be marked present. The freshmen who are enrolled in regular English, are more of a challenge, than the last three classes, who are juniors. The two freshmen classes are reading Romeo and Juliet, by William Shakespeare. The first six minutes of the class was spent doing an ‘entry task’ in which the students spend six minutes writing down questions they have on Romeo and Juliet, grades or what happened during their weekend. All was going well with the entry task, until Mrs. Smith asked me to lead a lesson. I stepped up to the board and discussed Romeo and Juliet; luckily, it was a success, and the students seemed as anxious as me, but in that moment, I felt incredibly nervous. Unlike the first group of freshmen, the second class was a little bigger, so they had to do more mundane things, such as working in groups to look at the text. The last three classes are juniors, and they are working on a paper about religion in schools. I get to help with that, so I am excited! Midterms are due in two days, so the mood is a mix of angst and chaos. I don’t know if the students are usually this rowdy, but maybe because I’m new they think they have a right to goof off in front of the teacher.


With corrections:
Today was the first day of my three week observation. As I walked into class, with a natural high of anxiety and excitement [Participle], I noticed that there were only 15 students in first period. Mrs. Smith, a lovable, yet strict teacher [Appositive], was the woman I was observing for, and she told the class that they needed to sit down if they wanted to be marked present. The freshmen, wild and anxious [adjectives out of order], who are enrolled in regular English, are more of a challenge, than the last three classes, who are juniors. The two freshmen classes are reading Romeo and Juliet, by William Shakespeare, the noble and classic [adjectives out of order] literary being. The first six minutes of the class was spent doing an ‘entry task’ in which the students spend six minutes writing down questions they have on Romeo and Juliet, grades or what happened during their weekend. All was going well with the entry task, until Mrs. Smith asked me to lead a lesson. With my hands shaking, and nerves racing, [Absolute] I stepped up to the board and discussed Romeo and Juliet; luckily, it was a success, and the students seemed as anxious as me, but in that moment, I felt incredibly nervous. Unlike the first group of freshmen, the second class was a little bigger, so they had to do more mundane things, such as working in groups to look at the text. The last three classes are juniors, and they are working on a paper about religion in schools. I get to help with that, so I am excited! Midterms are due in two days, so the mood is a mix of angst and chaos. I don’t know if the students are usually this rowdy, but maybe because I’m new they think they have a right to goof off in front of the teacher.